Avoiding Fights in Relationships



One of the main fundamentals that hold a relationship together is having healthy communication. A few mandatory parts of communicating in a healthy manner involve feeling comfortable to speak your mind, communicating your feelings, and being able to listen to your partner’s feelings as well. When it comes to having arguments in relationships – we all have them, and it’s a very common thing. But what’s important to remember is that there are some things to keep in mind before that argument hits, and many times those arguments are actually preventable altogether.

Although I don’t believe in avoiding confrontation, I do believe in hashing things out and getting to the route of problems so they can be worked on, and solved whenever possible. I don’t believe in sweeping things under the rug, and I’m a definite big believer in improving relationships and making them so that both people feel heard, understood, even when they don’t agree with one another. Couples are never going to agree with each other on everything, and it’s important to realize that. 

A few ways to avoid getting to the point of an argument with your partner are those three fundamentals of having great communication. But more so, the way that you communicate plays a big role. The three aspects of communication should be instilled into the minds of both people in a relationship, and not only one – otherwise the fighting won’t stop. Having great communication takes time, practice, and patience. Therefore, if you’re willing to improve on your relationship, on yourself as a person, and so is your partner, then you’ll be way ahead of the game, and your relationship will stand a much better chance at being successful. 

The next time that you feel that fire rushing to your head and that built-up anger is rising and rising to the point where you feel you might explode, try doing the following:


  • Take a deep breath.
  • Be willing to compromise.
  • If you need a few minutes to compose yourself, let your partner know so that they don’t feel that you’re avoiding the situation where the conversation altogether, and then come back clear-headed and with a loving and logical approach.
  • Communicate your feelings, and let your partner know that you want to hear their feelings as well.
  • Keep a poised and calm manner when you speak your mind, but definitely speak it, and don’t sweep things under the rug
  • Remember to compromise and hear your partner out, so that you can both come up with a resolution to your disagreement or at least have some form of peace and understanding.
  • Be a good listener when it’s your partner’s turn to talk because after all, they were a spec full enough to hear you out when it was your turn to speak.
  • Remember that it’s not a battle of winning or losing, and the sole point of hashing things out is to improve your relationship, and whatever is bothering you as a couple.
  • Remember to nip things in the bud, and at it earlier stage of when things actually start to bother you, because the longer you wait to hash things out, the bigger the issue and turbulence might become Hopefully these tips can help you and your partner out.

It’s always good to address issues early on, so keep that in mind. Nipping things in the bud is always the best method. You definitely shouldn’t avoid confrontation or drama, because it not only won’t help you and your partner have a better relationship, but it could potentially destroy your relationship in the long run. Remember, loving, healthy, and happy relationships take love, effort, and hard work from both people, and they can’t be improved unless you’re both willing to improve on things, as well as communicate in a healthy manner. 

Anne Cohen
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