What Does Love Have to Do with It?



I’m sure that by now, most of us have heard the story and life of legend, Tina Turner. She sang an incredible song written by Terry Britten and Graham Lyle called, “What’s Love Got to Do with It.” Knowing that sometimes people experience abuse, and many hard times in their relationships, there’s a very common question that many people want to know. “What’s love got to do with it?” Is love enough? Can love really save our relationship or marriage? The answer I’d have to say would be, yes, it can. Love is enough.


Every relationship takes hard work, effort, and LOVE from both people. One-sided relationships never work, so obviously, love can’t fix everything. Relationships that are toxic should never be explored, or should end as soon as possible. As well, you should never get into a relationship with someone who you’re simply not compatible with, or even worse, when it’s with someone that you don’t get along with. Love has everything to do with being in a good relationship. The point in life is to be happy. When we surround ourselves with people who love us, we tend to feel happy. Therefore, a healthy and happy relationship has everything to do with love.


You need to acknowledge red flags from the get-go, and not brush things under the carpet and sweep them away as if toxic treatment, or abuse never happened. If you’re in a toxic relationship, obviously love won’t be enough. And definitely isn’t a good enough reason for someone to stay in a toxic situation, and if you’re already in one, you should get out of it as soon as possible. No one should ever even consider staying in an abusive relationship, despite what kind of abuse it is—whether neglect, psychological abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse, or anything else that I didn’t mention.


It’s never O.K. for someone to raise their hand to you, to put you down, or to be cruel or belittle you in any way whatsoever. If you let people treat you poorly, then they will—at least when they’re mean or toxic people. If someone is abusive towards you, then that person doesn’t know how to love. Maybe they never did. Maybe they were never given love, never taught to love, and simply don’t know how. But, either way, someone who’s abusive isn’t loving you. 


Being in a relationship with someone, and even more so, being married to someone, is something that needs to be well thought out. You should only be in a relationship with someone who makes you feel happier, not worse than you did when you were single. In other words, you shouldn’t only surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you, and make you feel happy, but it’s even more important to pick a partner in life who will make you feel the same way—happy.


Love can heal and inspire. Love is kindness and being selfless. Love is giving back, and even when it’s hard to do. Love is when you put other people before yourself. When you’re in a relationship with someone, you should do whatever you can in order to give and express your love to that person with your words, your actions, and by how you treat them. The way that you talk to someone can either be loving, or cruel and insensitive. Love is the very core foundation of what every relationship should be based on. Without love, we have nothing—no meaning, no beauty, no essence, and we’ll just be left with emptiness.


If you don’t think that love can save your relationship or marriage when you’re having hard times, then you were most likely in the wrong situation to begin with. Any situation that was routed from love can be saved. But like anything good in life, it’s going to take maintaining. It takes hard work, effort, and being selfless and giving to one another, and to recognize that you’re both imperfect. As well, you both need to be willing to improve on your relationship, and to heal one another—and the best way to do that is with love. 

Anne Cohen
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